Insights » Personality Development and Success in Life

Personality Development and Success in Life

InsightNO17 jpgWhen I was a school student, my notion was that film stars fashion models and body builders have super personality. To me outward look and glamour were important to become a smart person. Later when I joined for Psychology course my whole concept of personality had collapsed like a sand castle and I understood that, as far as personality is concerned handsome or beautiful look is only a tip of iceberg. However, many of us still think physical appearance and beauty equate a great personality. If six pack body or slim beauty is only a minor factor of personality, what is personality?  


Personality is the sum total of how you look,  how you speak, how  you  connect with people and  how you confidently face life. The Personality is way we think, feel and behave that is what makes all of us unique. An individual’s personality refers to his/her appearance, characteristics, attitude,mind-set, inter personal relations and behaviour with others.


Importance of personality development

Until quite recently it was believed that personality is permanent ie. cannot change.  In 1890 William James, the famous Harvard psychologist, wrote in his influential work ‘The Principles of Psychology’, that personality was "set in plaster" by early adulthood. However, modern studies show that while we can only enhance our looks to a certain extent, we have the ability to improve the personality as much as we want.

Our success in professional life, family life, personal life and social life depends on our personality. In fact, approximately 85 percent of our success and happiness depend on the strength of personality. Ultimately, it is your personality that determines whether people are attracted to, or shy away from you. Personality development plays an important role in developing not only your outer but also inner self. Everyone wants to be attractive to others. An impressive personality makes you stand apart from the rest. Personality development also plays a vital role in improving one’s communication skills. Personality development makes you a confident individual who is appreciated and respected wherever he goes.


How can you improve your personality?


Let us see some traits that make an attractive personality. 



  1. Positive outlook I came across many people who always complain and find fault with everyone and everything. Such people emit negative energy and make us unhappy. A positive attitude makes you happier, more creative, improves your relationships, and it even increases your chances of success in any endeavour. 
  2. Be confident Be confident in every respect. Our lifetime is short.  Enjoy every moment.  Do not waste precious time worrying about things you cannot control.  
  3. Know yourself Know your strengths and weakness. Work on your weak areas and develop your skills to excel in life. Many people are worried about what others think about them. 
  4. Enlarge friend’s circle Enlarge your friend circle. In my experience a wide network of friends from all walks of life will certainly enrich life. Join in clubs and associations in your work place, locality, school and colleges. Social networks such as facebook, whatsapp, twitter and linkdin will help you to be in touch your friends, classmates, relatives, professionals and meeting new people 
  5. Be flexible Always ready to accept changes and adapt to new situations. Flexibility and adaptability are signs of good personality. I have few friends who are stubborn, rigid and not open minded. I had seen the negative impact of  hard core nature on their career, family life and  friendships.
  6. Be courteous Polite behaviour is well appreciated and respected by everyone. Be humble and greet everyone with a smile.  Never shy away from helping or supporting your peers and being available to them whenever they need you.
  7.  Be a good listener Most people like to talk and not interested to listen while others speak. When somebody talks to you, listen with interest and give them all the attention and importance. Maintain a direct eye contact and appreciate with a nodding head or facial expressions. 
  8. Have an opinion Update yourself with latest local and world news and it will help you to form an opinion about various topics and issues. Don’t shy away from expressing your ideas fearing that others may disagree. .  Discussing issues and ideas are better than talking bad about people or gossiping.  
  9. Improve your Body Language Body language is very important for our personality. Walk in an upright position with shoulders straight. Do not droop. Sit in a relaxed posture and make always eye contact while speaking.
  10. Check your attire Be more attentive to your outward appearance. Dress smartly keeping in mind of your professional requirements and circumstances. 
  11. Communicate effectively Develop effective communication skills to enhance your personality. Whether you speak someone face to face or addressing a huge crowd, speaking skills will draw attention of others. Don’t shy away from any opportunity to speak whether it is a company meeting or club gathering. 
  12. Manage your emotions with care Emotional control is essential for a charming personality. Patience is better than violent reactions. I faced many embarrassing situations due to burst out and angry reactions. Keep a calm and stress free posture to smile on difficult situations.



Now it’s the time to take a sincere assessment of your personality based on the above traits.  I want to make it clear that, the above traits are not a complete list. There are hundreds of qualities that we can include to fine tune our personality.  Add more and more traits to your personality to make it attractive, charming and awesome.


DuglasJoseph jpgDuglas Joseph 


(Writer on Social, Educational and parenting issues. Conducting counselling and seminars on teenage, career guidance and  educational issues. Faculty at Gems Our Own English School Fujairah. Former faculty at Ministry of Education Maldives)


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